Dreams

So, last night I had a dream. I have had a few similar ones.


There was my wife. Smiling at me. She had come back (not exactly possible, she now sits in a box on the mantelpiece). I was trying to explain to her that I had a girlfriend and I was sorry but I needed to have someone to hold, I couldn't bare the loneliness. But she wouldn't listen. Every time I tried to talk to her about it she flitted off. I really wanted to ask her if it was ok to love someone else at the same time. But she wouldn't give me the chance.

I woke up feeling sad, frustrated and a bit like I was cheating on both of them. It's now evening and for some reason its torn me apart all day. I tried to go to work. I just couldn't I sat in the car for so long.

I know its a stage of grief. Doesn't make it easier.