Tonight dear reader I had to make a difficult choice. My health is never good and one of my problems is high blood pressure. I have pills but there are side effects. I'm on my 3rd type and this one causes extreme fatigue, weight gain and depression. I stopped taking them and my mood is better, the fatigue was starting to improve and I started losing weight.
My blood pressure is hitting dangerous levels. Tonight I made the difficult decision to take the pills again. I have an urgent GP booking that was made last year which in New Zealand means mid January. Regular bookings were not until March at the earliest.
I'm sitting here tonight a few hours after taking that pill and I can feel the depression seeping in already. I'll try to post good stuff but if I'm shitposting a bit, I apologize now. I'm heading for a dark place. The choice is go there or possibly have a stroke. Sometimes we have little choice. I'm not going to make my daughter an orphan. She's the only reason I stay in this world.
I can hear Polli in my mind saying "ya gotta do what ya gotta do." Haven't heard her in my mind in a long time.
We never want to be depressed but sometimes it cannot be avoided.
No comments:
Post a Comment